August 18, 2008...3:39 am

“Girlfriend” Guest Blogger Mandy Thompson

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Mandy Thompson

i‘m a singer, songwriter, worship leader, and wife….

maybe one day i’ll be a mom….

my husband is attending seminary in New England. therefore, i am perpetually cold.

i like the beach — namely, the beaches of the South that are perpetually warm. i dream about those sunny beaches regularly.

i love music…

i am a worship leader.

i’m constantly “improving” others’ recipes, but i don’t tell.

i feel deeply but rarely cry. i wish this was different.

i love my friends – treasure them and treasure the time we have.

i have no idea what i’ll be doing in the year 2010, but i look forward to finding out.

Here’s Mandy’s Post about girlfriends

The Official Scientific Study on Women’s Friendships

 its official: 

girlfriends are good for our mental stability  

  • girlfriends help us live longer
  • the lack of girlfriends has the same physical effect as smoking or obesity on a woman’s health.
  • girlfriends make us happier. seriously.

its true! its true! just ask the two female researchers from UCLA who conducted this study a few years ago. their conclusions led them to propose a female counterpart (“tend and befriend”) to the well-known “fight or flight” theory that has been around for decades.
inspiration for the “tend and befriend” research started when these two female researchers began to notice that, when they were stressed, they didn’t exhibit “fight or flight” behaviors that everyone has heard of. instead, they gathered together and talked and cleaned and talked and cleaned and cleaned and talked.

sound familiar, anyone?

they did some digging and discovered that 90% of the subjects that participated in the famous “fight or flight” studies were actually men. which meant that this long-established stress response theory was based on male-generated findings.

which meant the exhibited “fight or flight” response may not be characteristic of women. hhhmmmmm….

so, they conducted their own study and discovered that, under stress, women seem to gather to talk through worries. along with finding friendships as a means of coping with stress, we also have a pattern of cleaning things and caring for others when stress hits us. [duh!]

why is this official scientific study important? well, because there are actually physical/chemical/hormonal activities underneath this “tend and befriend” pattern. these behaviors release significant amounts of “oxytocin” in our brains, lowering our level of stress and producing a sense of calm and contentment. [ahhhh........]

thus, the “tend and befriend” theory emerged!

the full big worded, scientific report is here

a more “reader friendly” article reviewing the report is here

so…. next time you get stressed out, find a girlfriend and talk through things (which we always do), then go clean the house (which we always do)…

 if neither of these things work, then grab the nearest chunk of chocolate you can find, because there’s also research to suggest that chocolate is like a happy drug for the female brain.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Check her blog out Mandythompson.com

 

 

… Mandy has one of those blogs (MandyThompson.com) that you can’t lurk on for any length of time it actually becomes a habit, even an every couple hour habit.  Why?

 

 

Mandy Thompson is the real deal.

 

 

 If she’s struggling to get through something or just making people laugh at a hard question of life. Her subtle Southern nature draws people into real conversations  of authenticity and realness.

 

Mandy is talented, gifted, and I am so fortunate that I can call her friend.
With her as my girlfriend, I know I have a lifelong cheerleader.
… Love ya Mandy!!
 

 

 

 
 
 

 

10 Comments

  • Wow. Great stuff, Mandy.

    Thanks for being such a great host, Heidi.

  • mandy – i would have scoffed at this article a year ago! totally. i was doing “well” without “girlfriends”. well. i had them – but not to the depth this post suggest and encourages. oh boy! i am so girly now! shoot-darn!

    awesome, awesome post! but of course! i love you girl!

    thanks Heidi. and, you described Mandy so perfectly!

  • i have some family members that i wish i could force to read that report. they don’t “get” me or my recent cravings for girlfriend time (whether it be in person or via email/phone).

    sigh.

    thanks for this, mandy. and for doing this this week, heidi! AND… i love your redesign. this was my first-choice in layout, you know!

    (and apparently i’m the only one of our threesome who does NOT sport the hunormous sunglasses!)

  • Heidi: thank you for letting me be a part of this…. your words are too kind – i hope i can live up to them!!!
    can’t wait to hear what these other ladies have to say. love you too!

  • great post – i love when someone goes out and studies human behavior and then you realize that what they figured out is right! love. it.

    girlfriends are a must for this me and i’m currently on the hunt for some steady ones in this oh-so-fluid university community..

    thanks for hosting this Heidi, great idea!

  • Thanks Mandy – for doing all the research on the research. So very true. Often, when I’m stressed, and need human contact, the first thing I do is call a friend, or email a friend, or go out walking … with a friend. Great post – Great Host(ess). :)

  • I heart Mandy too. I heart your heart for people!

  • [...] stood by me through a lot of tough stuff especially the last eight months or so.  This post on Girlfriends rings home and reminds me of her.   Here’s to friends who listen even though they’ve [...]

  • miss mandy mac is my tutor on friendships. she’s a pro!

  • [...] i can’t believe i am in company with, to guest post on her blog. today is my day. monday was miss mandy pants’ day. tuesday was the incredible cindy bealls’ day and i believe thursday will be hope [...]


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