As I Rest In Joy

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I have a friend Tammy Hodge (Tam) over at inprogress, she’s amazing and she probably doesn’t even know it, but she is really good at taking someone’s heart and defining something so small and then makes it so powerful in them.  Let me explain.

Several years ago next month, I suffered a small stroke, after that her mission in life was to get me to write and write and write.  I did but quit at times, many times.  But she was my encourager.  During this process we became fast friends and now we are very close. 

Just a few days ago, I was sitting on the jetty with my notebook watching sunrise.  Something I have done a lot of in the past.  So I am sitting there journaling away and my heart just filled with this unexplainable joy.  I still can’t explain it.  I even had started singing.  Trust me you are all glad I was at the ocean by myself.  

But here’s the thing.  Even though I was at the jetty with this sudden burst of joy, I was praying for the toughest things I was facing: my job, my mom’s cancer, our budget, and my struggles with my 16 year old son.  Honestly I was hurting.  Alot.

But through the purple sunrise, through the crashing waves, and through the encouragement of a girlfriend saying two years ago in an email “sis, always find your joy” that morning, when I had wish I could have thrown in the towel. I found my joy In Him

Here’s that journal entry:

I love beautiful things. I love kisses from my little man on the neck. I love sleep. I love peaceful rainy stormy afternoons. I love coffee made in just the right way. I so love my special girlfriends. I love being in the silence with no demands, I love the ocean the most secure place on this earth. I love a really good cry, a good movie and a good friend to be there to talk about it with. I love Paul’s squeeze right before I fall to sleep…

I love paper, blank with so much potential

I love to know that I shared Huckleberries and cheesecake with the girlfriend that knows me the most.

 I love stories that I relate to; that makes me feel normal, and not so all alone. I love freshly washed sheets and a warm quilt on my big comfy bed.

 I love my nightly shower after a very long day at work

I love the business neighbor who knows that I love my California burrito with well done eggs and no pico.

I love remembering

I love the effortless joys God has created on this earth….just for me.

I love the LOVE of God   It has so many different realms, echelons, capacities, and significances. It grabs and pulls deep inside and evokes such a massive variety of emotions. Shallow or deep, the kind of love only that God gives us to experience on this earth…brings such a simple gift…Joy.

There is no other reason on this earth why we would spend so much time, using a variety of media expressions to study, understand, contemplate and dwell on this emotion every human carries with them through life,  except that it brings us joy.

I scream at the waves this morning thankful that HE has everything in control.

As I rest in joy.

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