The Chapter Book

 

I was sitting inside my Dr’s office yesterday waiting patiently to get inside  and I grew fidgety although it was so early.  Yes, I was armored with my coffee but I was still fidgety. I picked up a book off the end table, it was one those smutty romance novels.  Since, I was limited in time and NO way was I going to have this book follow me, I went straight to the center for some action. The female heroine was being described and it really caught my attention, her name was Raine.  I looked up the meaning of her name and it means “counsel, mighty army”  

Raine’s description is unfolding as being filled with strength and she demonstrates fierce safeguard and compassion for the one in her care.  Her beauty is clearly evident as you gaze into her face which shows the evidence of the battle she’s fought in the existence of blood from a wound on her brow. 

There is nothing about her existence in this particular moment of this paragraph in Chapter 6 that feels the least a bit hard.  She is pulsating, animated and soft and you are so drawn in by her keenness to jeopardize her own safety for the life of her brood.

I want my life to have a paragraph in chapter 6 like this one. 

I want to be encircled by a community of people who want to live precarious and transparent lives in order to participate in God’s salvation of people.  I want to have companions riding next to me who are so ready to draw their own swords, and that they are not threatened by the idea that mine is in my hand. 

 I want to name evil for what it is and then stand against it in a real and transparent approach, slashing at the enemy’s throat at “I am going to….” And stand up tall, ferocious, and all surrendering to a living God.

 I want to be part of a community that celebrates; I MEAN CELEBRATE true everlasting beauty and a simple tenderness and strength that in turn expose the imitations when they are present. 

 I want to fight for the restitution of life for those who’ve been stabbed and wounded by life and are losing touch with whom they are.

 I want to fight A GOOD FIGHT OF FAITH… AN Everlasting fight of faith.

With beauty… elegance… fierceness… compassion…  and  celebration..

As I Rest In Joy

I have a friend Tammy Hodge (Tam) over at inprogress, she’s amazing and she probably doesn’t even know it, but she is really good at taking someone’s heart and defining something so small and then makes it so powerful in them.  Let me explain.

Several years ago next month, I suffered a small stroke, after that her mission in life was to get me to write and write and write.  I did but quit at times, many times.  But she was my encourager.  During this process we became fast friends and now we are very close. 

Just a few days ago, I was sitting on the jetty with my notebook watching sunrise.  Something I have done a lot of in the past.  So I am sitting there journaling away and my heart just filled with this unexplainable joy.  I still can’t explain it.  I even had started singing.  Trust me you are all glad I was at the ocean by myself.  

But here’s the thing.  Even though I was at the jetty with this sudden burst of joy, I was praying for the toughest things I was facing: my job, my mom’s cancer, our budget, and my struggles with my 16 year old son.  Honestly I was hurting.  Alot.

But through the purple sunrise, through the crashing waves, and through the encouragement of a girlfriend saying two years ago in an email “sis, always find your joy” that morning, when I had wish I could have thrown in the towel. I found my joy In Him

Here’s that journal entry:

I love beautiful things. I love kisses from my little man on the neck. I love sleep. I love peaceful rainy stormy afternoons. I love coffee made in just the right way. I so love my special girlfriends. I love being in the silence with no demands, I love the ocean the most secure place on this earth. I love a really good cry, a good movie and a good friend to be there to talk about it with. I love Paul’s squeeze right before I fall to sleep…

I love paper, blank with so much potential

I love to know that I shared Huckleberries and cheesecake with the girlfriend that knows me the most.

 I love stories that I relate to; that makes me feel normal, and not so all alone. I love freshly washed sheets and a warm quilt on my big comfy bed.

 I love my nightly shower after a very long day at work

I love the business neighbor who knows that I love my California burrito with well done eggs and no pico.

I love remembering

I love the effortless joys God has created on this earth….just for me.

I love the LOVE of God   It has so many different realms, echelons, capacities, and significances. It grabs and pulls deep inside and evokes such a massive variety of emotions. Shallow or deep, the kind of love only that God gives us to experience on this earth…brings such a simple gift…Joy.

There is no other reason on this earth why we would spend so much time, using a variety of media expressions to study, understand, contemplate and dwell on this emotion every human carries with them through life,  except that it brings us joy.

I scream at the waves this morning thankful that HE has everything in control.

As I rest in joy.

My Baby Turns 9!

I  Love you Little man!!

Daily Layers

 

Just when I think I know who I am, I discover another layer that needs to be scraped off.

 At times, I feel raw from the grit, thinking perhaps I’ve gone too deep; and then there are times when I feel revitalized and liberated from dead layers of old masks.

 I have made a hundred of wrong turns to get to this clearing..

But here I am now free at last bravely facing and pressing …

this eventful path toward the purpose of Truth.

 It seems the closer I get to me, the deeper I become connected with my Master.. The daily ridding of myself that leaves me REAL and vulnerable before God.

I am free to truly know God and be known by Him.

Although, I still have a ways to go and life layers yet to strip…

I write along the way so that I may capture the essence of the God that I follow

Intimacy With God Is an Antidote

 

Today, I found myself talking alone with God – hearing Him as HE shores up my thinking that I am a precious rare gem to Him, made in His image to glorify Him here on earth, and I am His heir and yes, He is rebirthing my image in Him because that in reality is true significance, true security in Him.

There is nothing else I do or chase after or get that will measure up to the rest I will find or receive from Him – this sense of human worth is from our holy God – that is my greatest treasure!

Intimacy with Christ is the antidote to any issue that circulates in the human heart.

God is in control of our every situation.